This past Sunday was 40 weeks. 40 weeks of growing and protecting life inside. Dreaming and thinking of this little one’s personality and how it will add to our family. And weeks and months of watching this baby bump grow and feel this little one stir.
Many know I’m three for three spot on my due date for going into labor or having my babies be born. That has got to be a record, right?
So Sunday came and went. And Monday came and went. But no baby came.
Not going to lie – with the other three, there were some ugly cries near my due date as I woke up each morning still pregnant and not having gone into labor overnight – because who goes into labor and has babies during the day?!
But here I am post due date (which who comes up with a specific due date anyway?!), and I find myself peaceful and content.
Because I have learned that in life – there are circumstances – and most times we don’t have control over those circumstances and we can’t easily change them. We also have thoughts about those circumstances, lots and lots of thoughts, and that is what we do have full control over.
This week I have focused on all the thoughts I have control over and all the things that are going well. That nothing is going wrong just because this baby hasn’t arrived yet, that a due date only has the meaning I give to it, that I have wonderful family here to entertain the other kiddos and give me space, that I get a few more days to feel this baby roll and kick on the inside, that I am still sleeping through the night, and that no one has been pregnant forever (the statistics are in my favor!). I’ve drained the drama of how I think things should go, and I get to decide to enjoy these moments.
“You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.”
Psalm 139:5
I read this verse the morning I found out I was pregnant, and during this pregnancy I have continued to come back to it time and time again. This is the verse that I will continue to pray over this little one all of the days of his/her life.
God is good – He has gone before me and the waiting is not a surprise to Him. If anything, the timing is perfect. Just as it is meant to be. And there is great peace in that!